Almost here

I have 3 more weeks. I just finished my one week Thanksgiving break. It was so incredibly needed, and wonderfully restful--not that I actually slept much.

I need to tell you about my books and my movies. I just can't do it right now.

I've been reading on this trip, and I desperately need someone to talk my books over with. Ebert wrote this article which helped a bit
http://blogs.suntimes.com/ebert/2009/10/books_do_furnish_a_life.html

Read it over and see if you could live in University House--I think I could.

And when I get back, we'll talk.

If I say I missed you a million times, will you believe me?

Because I seriously have.

I am bursting with information. I have so much to tell the world. There are multiple areas of discussion that I am ready to talk/argue/blog/thing about. I've just got to find people who will do all of the above.

Now, however, is not the time for that.

What you need to know:

1. I am alive.

I know. This might have been the longest gap I have ever gone without posting. But that doesn't mean I'm dead--It just means I never have internet.

2. I am well.

I am fed. I sleep. Even though I'm not at home, I am well taken care of. Even though I don't have all the comforts of home, I am still alright. Even though people never let me watch football, I am still breathing (it was touch and go for a while though)

3. The Patriots are awesome.

59-0 baby. 5 touchdowns in one quarter. My heart jumped with joy. My heart would have danced had I been watching the game, but we'll settle for jumping.

4. I am reading.

This is my sole consolation. I have read books--beautiful books. I have read books I've wanted to read my whole life, yet never found the time. I have read books that have completely changed my viewpoint on some issues.

Too bad I don't have time to tell you about them.

Oh Yeah

It is finally here.

I have been insanely busy the past few weeks. We've been training for our group, and we officially leave on Friday.

You know what's perfect about that day?

It happens after Thursday.

Which is the NFL kickoff.

My world just got better.



(Also enjoy 09/09/09--I know I have)

Please don't stop me now

--This is day 7 in "The 7 Last Days of Summer-- (Yes. This might be the last you hear from me in a long time)

Summer is over.

I was feeling sorry for myself today. My last two weeks have been insanely busy. I haven't had a day to call my own in a long time. And suddenly here it was, the last day of Summer.

I worked today--both jobs and my least favorite schedule. The specific times and details aren't important. What's important is how non-summer-relaxing this schedule is.

But then, I went and celebrated with the Summer of the Four. And suddenly it was okay.

We ate food--good food. We talked--nothing spectacular. We sang along--not the prettiest sound. We came up with the perfect adjective to describe an event--harder than it sounds. We enjoyed each other, the restaurant atmosphere, the beautiful weather, the enjoyable summer, the hope of things to come, and our theme song.

It was a good summer.

And yeah, that's my parting comment.

My (short) explanation- I also have a long version

--This is day 6 in "The 7 Last Days of Summer"--

I feel as if I should explain my next semester.

If you're reading this blog, you're probably a friend and you probably already know this, but I'm still going to explain.

This next semester I'm not taking any classes. When I told someone that, he asked me if I was dropping out. I assured him it was nothing so glamorous.

I am (starting on Monday) going to be in a team that goes out to promote the college in high schools. I'll be gone all semester.

There were a lot of reasons for this decision. And even though several times this summer I've doubted my sanity in accepting--I know this is what I need to be doing.

Here are a few questions people ask (and their respective answers):

1. Are you going to be behind in school?

Yes. I'll graduate a semester late. I did, however, switch my major after my freshman year, so I am already a little behind--this might actually help me get on track.

2. You're getting paid, right?

Yes. The school pays for the following semester. And since one of my life goals is to graduate from college debt free, and with some money saved up for an apartment, and/or grad school, this will help.

3. How many are there of you?

6. 3 girls and 3 guys. They stick us in a 15 passenger van, and...yeah that's about it.

4. Where are you going to be?

All over the states. I'm going to see Virgina, Maryland, North and South Carolina, Connecticut, New Hampshire, Pennsylvania, Colorado, Kansas, Missouri, New Jersey, Delaware, and all the great Midwestern states--several times.

5. Will you still blog?

All right, admittedly that is not one of the main questions on people's minds. But I think about it. I don't know--that's the simplest answer. We're going to be busy. I might be too tired to ever write in you. I might be so annoyed/overjoyed/disgusted/elated with my circumstances that all I can do is write in you. I hope I can at least keep up the once a month post, but don't count on anything.

Ah, don't get depressed. It's okay. I'm not leaving just yet. We still have one more day of summer.

You're right--it's depressing.

Corporate and I

--This is day 5 in "The 7 Last Days of Summer"--

I think a first, part-time high-school job is important for teenagers.

You learn skills you'll (hopefully) never use again. You become knowledgeable about things no one should ever be knowledgeable about. You deal with strange people daily. You learn how to juggle work-schedule/school/free time. You learn how to deal with co-workers. You learn how to deal with managers. And most importantly--you learn what Corporate is.

If you don't already know what Corporate is, let me fill you in:

Corporate is omnipotent.
Corporate is perfect.
Corporate hierarchy is flawless.
Corporate is a thing of beauty.

I remember being confused by Corporate (and yes, I am going to continue capitalizing its name) when I first started my job.

I read their memos, and found them amusing (so they're not exact quotes--this is, however, what they all sound like):

"The trends of the 08-09 Summer Season Clearance show the shifting of the economic structure. The general office team has decided to provide each store with the strategical connections to empower each member to fulfill the initiatives fully."

"While the imperatives issued in the last store-policy email have been implemented and been observed, the issue now turns to the operation head. If the head, while involving store and district policy, would see an area of yellow or red, the store manager would be the one to pass on the new policy to their teammates, on a personal and one-on-one basis."

"We are excited to roll out a new program that benefits the lives of our customers, shoppers, employees, and the general public. We will no longer be offering the special savings discount on the items (see the 4 attached sheets) for the well-being of our customer. We are sure this new program will revitalize shopper continuity, well-being satisfaction, and return-ability. Be eager in representing this program to the community."

I was amused by the memo's because they were poorly written, and because their exciting news was usually bad for everyone involved.

I quickly discovered other employees did not share my amusement. Sure they thought Corporate asked them to do stupid things, but they also thought that somehow, someway, somewhere Corporate still knew best.

I couldn't understand why they thought people sitting in an office from 9-5 knew more about their jobs than themselves-the ones actually completing the work.

But, ladies and gentleman, I discovered the secret to Corporate. The way Corporations exist is to hire hard workers, but not (necessarily) smart workers. Then, the Corporation throws around big words, numbers, graphs, stock photos, and titles (I think only the Government throws around more titles) all of which have one specific purpose. Simply put it says, "I am better and smarter than you."

It's childish how badly Corporate is scared of anything than what they're comfortable with. It's pathetic the steps Corporate takes to ensure themselves from ever being wrong (even when they are). It's amazing how many people fall for it every day.

"Sure", the lower-levels say, "Corporate is stupid, and doesn't understand my job. It tells me stuff I don't need to know, and doesn't tell me what I do need. But they're higher up than I am--they must know something I don't know."

They don't. Trust me, they seriously don't.

"I didn't do enough"

--This is day 4 in "The 7 Last Days of Summer"--

I've been thinking about injustice.

I've been thinking about it for awhile. I can't track down exactly where it started, I was in the middle of it before I knew it began (I love that sentence). But now I can't make it stop.

The more I think about it, the harder it seems to grasp. Not the concept. The concept is simple. But how the concept is played out--that's what's hard.

It's easy to know, to say people are unjust. ("People are unjust"--that's how easy it is.) But it's incredibly hard to come to terms with the extent of injustice people inflict.

I started my summer off with reading about injustice. I didn't chose the book because of that. I didn't even know it was a main theme until I got in the middle of the book--I just knew I wanted to read it. About halfway through the book, suddenly injustice was all I could see.

I can't blame the book entirely though. I've been watching movies. Many plot themes in books and movies are driven by some form of injustice. For some reason, I've been reading/seeing them all this summer. I've also been re-thinking through some situations--injustice plays a large theme in each one.

If you knew my life, you would know there was a moment this summer in which injustice and stupidity collided--at that moment they were one and the same.

This leads me to wondering, is injustice always stupid? Are there good injustices?
Is injustice really everywhere? It seems like it is. But I also know when you're thinking about something seriously, it becomes all you think and see.

I've also been wondering about the extent of injustice. What is the height of injustice? Are there levels or degrees of injustice? What kind of injustice is worse than another?

I watched a movie. I had needed to see this movie for a long time. While I was watching it, I remember thinking "This--what these people are doing here--this is injustice. This is the height of injustice." The film did not condone the injustice, and it was one of the most moving films I had ever seen.

Later that day, I watched another movie (It was my day off-deal with it). It started simply enough. Suddenly I discovered injustice was rampant in this film as well.
Yes, it was a different kind of injustice. Instead of dealing with a race, it was dealing with one human. The film was supposed to be romantic, but yet all I could see was the injustice.

I was disturbed. I didn't feel the way about the second film's injustice as I had about the first film's injustice. Was I wrong? Should I feel the same about all injustices?

But none of those are my real problems. My real problem is "What does this mean for me?"

Intellectual exercises are wonderful, but they can only take you so far. At a point, the exercise becomes personal. Trust me, I know.

There's a group, and they are pushing for a bill to be passed. I look at this bill, I look at this group, and I wonder "Is pushing this through unjust to other people?"
and "Is not pushing it through unjust?"

I look at this group's history. I see issues where I firmly believe they failed. I see times when I believe they should have stood for true justice (not what they were told was justice), and I'm deeply disturbed they haven't.

I wonder why this bill is different from those other times. Am I one of the ones going along simply because it sounds right? If the bill is a form of injustice (to either party), is that all right? Are there acceptable forms of injustice? Like the movies, can I be horrified by one, but complacent about the other? Are future generations going to look back and say "How did they not see the injustice of this?"
"How did they not stop what they were doing and fight for justice?"

Is justice what I want?

Am I fighting against injustice?

Should I be fighting against all injustices, or simply select injustices?

What should I be doing?


What was the response to the quote in the title? If you remember, there were vague reassurances, the promise of a brighter tomorrow, and a looking at past accomplishments--it was, in essence, a placation.

And yet, you still knew the man was right--he didn't do enough. He could have done more, but he didn't.


I don't want that to be me.